This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Still dying that you shit outside
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Randomize
