shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
