"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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