Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
handjob tips. give me some.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
