I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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