Where did you get a picture of my penis
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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