East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize