I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
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