Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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