Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
