Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
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