Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize