office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
