Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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