If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
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Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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