umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
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