This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize