is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
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Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
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Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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