ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize