Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
