I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
