Sry I called you an 8
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
We smell like vodka and hangover
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