He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
