Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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