One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.