The air taste purple.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
