Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night