let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
accomplished twins. life is a go
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Fuck appropriateness.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.