You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Send us your Text From Last Night!
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars