sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Send us your Text From Last Night!
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
