I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Send us your Text From Last Night!
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it