If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.