drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets