Texts From Last Night

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(707): View more from California

you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!

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(707): you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?! http://tfl.nu/ug5x

Replies (17) Good night (3699) Bad night (630)
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(631): View more from New York

im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies

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(631): im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies http://tfl.nu/qgfc

Replies (64) Good night (19592) Bad night (1395)
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(813): View more from Florida

I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???

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(813): I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business??? http://tfl.nu/t2g2

Replies (22) Good night (5149) Bad night (668)
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(404): View more from Georgia

she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.

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(404): she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis. http://tfl.nu/x2kt

Replies (67) Good night (10902) Bad night (1040)
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(626): View more from California

They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes

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(626): They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes http://tfl.nu/n6ba

Replies (9) Good night (4175) Bad night (994)
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(352): View more from Florida

all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits

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(352): all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits http://tfl.nu/ppej

Replies (37) Good night (5836) Bad night (737)
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(207): View more from Maine

this boner is exhausting

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(207): this boner is exhausting http://tfl.nu/qxdc

Replies (26) Good night (4243) Bad night (1232)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.

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(860): I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus. http://tfl.nu/nv5c

Replies (17) Good night (4243) Bad night (648)
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(678): View more from Georgia

You can't date a girl from every country.

(770): View more from Georgia

I'm the captain planet of women

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(678): You can't date a girl from every country. (770): I'm the captain planet of women http://tfl.nu/8wp1

Replies (19) Good night (5040) Bad night (587)
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(630): View more from Illinois

They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.

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(630): They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today. http://tfl.nu/t7wc

Replies (18) Good night (4616) Bad night (555)
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(662): View more from Mississippi

They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.

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(662): They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say. http://tfl.nu/fs2e

Replies (70) Good night (10360) Bad night (1272)
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(971): View more from Oregon

So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"

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(971): So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully" http://tfl.nu/lw3x

Replies (12) Good night (10633) Bad night (925)
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(214): View more from Texas

In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.

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(214): In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong. http://tfl.nu/vlez

Replies (29) Good night (7635) Bad night (782)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day

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(978): i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day http://tfl.nu/1bya

Replies (27) Good night (4070) Bad night (477)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night

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(202): i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night http://tfl.nu/pk50

Replies (13) Good night (4749) Bad night (704)

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