I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....