Texts From Last Night

Favorite
(817): View more from Texas

maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(817): maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me. http://tfl.nu/m7oc

Replies (14) Good night (4994) Bad night (629)
Favorite
(314): View more from Missouri

I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(314): I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today. http://tfl.nu/ix6a

Replies (44) Good night (7088) Bad night (1337)
Favorite
(818): View more from California

I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(818): I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter http://tfl.nu/u1op

Replies (24) Good night (7130) Bad night (918)
Favorite
(903): View more from Texas

Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.

(1-314): View more from Missouri

Me specifically?

(903): View more from Texas

Yep.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(903): Today in psych we learned that you are a whore. (1-314): Me specifically? (903): Yep. http://tfl.nu/w818

Replies (44) Good night (9744) Bad night (1212)
Favorite
(216): View more from Ohio

wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?

(330): View more from Ohio

yes... and buy you lunch

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(216): wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer? (330): yes... and buy you lunch http://tfl.nu/rnfb

Replies (24) Good night (8093) Bad night (748)
Favorite
(707): View more from California

he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?

(1-707): View more from California

logic in its finest

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(707): he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i? (1-707): logic in its finest http://tfl.nu/z7qz

Replies (41) Good night (4759) Bad night (2689)
Favorite
(907): View more from Alaska

the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(907): the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops http://tfl.nu/07bg

Replies (45) Good night (10630) Bad night (1055)
Favorite
(614): View more from Ohio

She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(614): She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up. http://tfl.nu/g4hi

Replies (10) Good night (5791) Bad night (647)
Favorite
(760): View more from California

We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(760): We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again. http://tfl.nu/a0p6

Replies (23) Good night (4445) Bad night (1425)
Favorite
(224): View more from Illinois

She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(224): She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand. http://tfl.nu/cnkx

Replies (25) Good night (6652) Bad night (693)
Favorite
(412): View more from Pennsylvania

thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(412): thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out. http://tfl.nu/825u

Replies (14) Good night (3702) Bad night (847)
Favorite
(+44): View more from United Kingdom

It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(+44): It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty. http://tfl.nu/g5dx

Replies (22) Good night (862) Bad night (6344)
Favorite
(239): View more from Florida

it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(239): it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming. http://tfl.nu/ara4

Replies (39) Good night (5131) Bad night (781)
Favorite
(860): View more from Connecticut

Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(860): Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog http://tfl.nu/fdsx

Replies (27) Good night (1607) Bad night (7357)
Favorite
(701): View more from North Dakota

Want any specific kind of beer?

(623): View more from Arizona

Yeah. Alcohol flavor.

(701): View more from North Dakota

Got it. Anything but Miller.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(701): Want any specific kind of beer? (623): Yeah. Alcohol flavor. (701): Got it. Anything but Miller. http://tfl.nu/wg65

Replies (39) Good night (7228) Bad night (971)

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: