He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Send us your Text From Last Night!
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt