is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.