Texts From Last Night

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(901): View more from Tennessee

All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.

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(901): All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name. http://tfl.nu/tyab

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(773): View more from Illinois

So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.

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(773): So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight. http://tfl.nu/dnnn

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours

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(617): i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours http://tfl.nu/0tnj

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(425): View more from Washington

he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.

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(425): he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis. http://tfl.nu/d5v8

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(347): View more from New York

We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job

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(347): We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job http://tfl.nu/wtkj

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(701): View more from North Dakota

Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?

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(701): Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave? http://tfl.nu/y6y0

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(503): View more from Oregon

I peed while puking? Even better

(1-503): View more from Oregon

Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are

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(503): I peed while puking? Even better (1-503): Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are http://tfl.nu/zcfc

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(303): View more from Colorado

i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass

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(303): i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass http://tfl.nu/z36r

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(732): View more from New Jersey

you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"

(1-732): View more from New Jersey

did i?

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(732): you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?" (1-732): did i? http://tfl.nu/syum

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!

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(262): Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time! http://tfl.nu/qxxi

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(210): View more from Texas

I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.

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(210): I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy. http://tfl.nu/fwj0

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(410): View more from Maryland

It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.

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(410): It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force. http://tfl.nu/y0by

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(585): View more from New York

i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW

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(585): i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW http://tfl.nu/w5kh

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(850): View more from Florida

Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?

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(850): Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up? http://tfl.nu/shrn

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(708): View more from Illinois

you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend

(1-708): View more from Illinois

why?

(708): View more from Illinois

so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.

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(708): you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend (1-708): why? (708): so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement. http://tfl.nu/h2nt

Replies (163) Good night (3378) Bad night (1053)

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