Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?