I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Send us your Text From Last Night!
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.