He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?