I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Send us your Text From Last Night!
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Holy shit dude........stairs
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask