Texts From Last Night

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(847): View more from Illinois

Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?

(262): View more from Wisconsin

Do you want cuervo gold or silver?

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(847): Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight? (262): Do you want cuervo gold or silver? http://tfl.nu/7twk

Replies (11) Good night (2457) Bad night (194)
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(804): View more from Virginia

How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?

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(804): How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now? http://tfl.nu/mo61

Replies (16) Good night (2055) Bad night (208) Order T-Shirt
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.

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(570): You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash. http://tfl.nu/b0ts

Replies (19) Good night (1576) Bad night (308) Order T-Shirt
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(917): View more from New York City

I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.

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(917): I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration. http://tfl.nu/hksr

Replies (5) Good night (502) Bad night (1273) Order T-Shirt
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(928): View more from Arizona

Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.

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(928): Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment. http://tfl.nu/kmtk

Replies (10) Good night (345) Bad night (872) Order T-Shirt
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(917): View more from New York City

Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.

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(917): Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep. http://tfl.nu/ccvs

Replies (4) Good night (962) Bad night (249)
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(716): View more from New York

I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.

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(716): I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start. http://tfl.nu/5uu7

Replies (13) Good night (1913) Bad night (213)
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(905): View more from Ontario

I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal

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(905): I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal http://tfl.nu/u38b

Replies (6) Good night (1484) Bad night (322) Order T-Shirt
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(917): View more from New York City

Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.

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(917): Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets. http://tfl.nu/ksjf

Replies (10) Good night (549) Bad night (1119) Order T-Shirt
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(352): View more from Florida

She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.

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(352): She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look. http://tfl.nu/0p9m

Replies (5) Good night (302) Bad night (1205) Order T-Shirt
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(989): View more from Michigan

walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.

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(989): walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too. http://tfl.nu/do4j

Replies (14) Good night (2375) Bad night (176) Order T-Shirt
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(317): View more from Indiana

I cant shower it involves moving...

(219): View more from Indiana

Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.

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(317): I cant shower it involves moving... (219): Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame. http://tfl.nu/d6ka

Replies (8) Good night (1745) Bad night (221)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.

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(608): He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does. http://tfl.nu/dgwh

Replies (6) Good night (1413) Bad night (149)
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(952): View more from Minnesota

It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.

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(952): It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix. http://tfl.nu/eau6

Replies (3) Good night (280) Bad night (770) Order T-Shirt
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(239): View more from Florida

All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth

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(239): All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth http://tfl.nu/rwpm

Replies (9) Good night (346) Bad night (1225) Order T-Shirt

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