Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Send us your Text From Last Night!
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick