Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
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HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
And then my night got REAL pukey
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I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for