Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Send us your Text From Last Night!
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
