And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.