Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
Are my feet made of real feet?
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Follow @tfln
Cracked IndieClick Humor