This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan