What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.