I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.