So how was he last night?
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
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So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving