You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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