why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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